He Cheats Because He Loves Me?
If you’re a woman and reading this I know what you’re thinking, a man can’t love a woman and cheat on her at the same time; the two just don’t seem to go together. Yet I’ve sat on the phone listening to my girlfriends whine and complain about dealing with men, black men in particular and their cheating ways.
Ask any of your girlfriends how often this conversation comes up and I bet all of them have at least one friend with a cheating boyfriend or husband. Case in point; “Wifey” calls me and tells me that she caught her man cheating on her…again, and of course this time it was with some chick on his Facebook account. Without tellin’ her business, I can tell you that she read some really dirty messages that no man in a relationship should be sending to another woman. Why does this woman need to know how big your d*ck is? Why does she have your BBM Pin? And why is she sending you half-naked pictures? You know how that story plays out. I’m telling you Facebook has ruined so many relationships, but that’s another story.
So I asked Wifey, “Are you going to leave him?” I mean that’s what you’re supposed to do when your man steps out on you right? You’re supposed to pack up his sh*t and throw it in his car and set that b*tch on fire. Then snap your fingers and Naomi Campbell walk it out in some red bottom soles. But she says, like I’m sure many woman you know have said time and time again…”but, I love him.”. So she stays, and for the next few weeks it’s champagne and strawberry kinda nights. And they lived happily ever after, right?
Why do black men cheat when they know that at the end of the day the woman at home is the one they want to be with? I mean is it the thrill of the chase? Is it the feel of new pu**y tighter than the one you’ve got at home? Or, is it that the wifey at home can’t jook as well as the gyal pon di side?
I asked a girlfriend of mine these questions and she thought it was simply that black men are greedy. She thought that “black men are just never satisfied even when the woman does all that she’s supposed to do” as a wife or as a girlfriend. I on the other hand thought that it was because the girl on the side filled a void that the wifey wasn’t filling for whatever reason. Her ears perked up when I said this to her. I mean, I know men who cheat because the girl on the side let’s him explore all of his sexual fantasies, some that he doesn’t think his wifey should even be doing. Generally speaking, the wifey isn’t usually the best sex of a man’s life, but she is the best sex he will have for life. On the other hand, the girl on the side is the one who doesn’t complain when he accidentally cums in her hair. She doesn’t nag after he’s come home from a long day of work. She’s the one who listens and is always happy to see him.
But if your man cheats on you does this mean he doesn’t love you?
Looking back at my friend who recently caught her man cheating, again, I understand in part why she’s staying and why she loves him. When she had a man who’s doing what a man should do for their home it makes it more difficult for her to leave. He comes home to her (mostly…lol), he provides for her, and he has helped to build a family with her. In her mind his cheating was just part of what is to be expected when dating a black man nowadays. This was just something that she would eventually get over with time. At the end of the day she says, “all black men cheat, but my man loves me.”
Agree or disagree? Either way speak on it.